Dream Your Dream

[Fiona766]

Bonjour, Je dois écrire un dialogue avec une intrigue, j'ai pris compte des remarques de Monsieur JRB, j'ai choisi le passé. J'hésite toujours entre le prétérit et le prétérit continu parfois, Voici le début:

Dream you dream (c'est le sujet)

It was a starry night, the big orange flames of a bonfire danced in breeze. It was warm. They were sitting/sat around the fire.

William played guitar, Mary sang and her wonderful voice echoed (or resounded?) in the darkness. The drummers played joyfully. This beautiful music played along with Trisha and Merce who were turning round. Their bright eyes and warm smiles illuminated the night; their caravans were into the forest, thanks to the sparkling moon.

In the morning, another destination must be chosen by the caravans. The sunlight shined on the road. It was a a good time for the band. They stopped at the beach for swimming. The sea was not cold. Mary sat quietly on the beach because she waseight months pregnant. William was supposed to buy some food for Mary (Si je veux dire 'he was suppposed to go to a shop to buy som food for her, la construction est-elle bonne?)

So after swimming he went to the nearest supermarket. So he walked around the road, when a woman came near him. Worried, he attentively observed the face of this woman. Then he noticed a smile on her face.

- 'Hello! How are you? What are you doing here?' she asked

- 'Hum..Hello. I'm fine...what am I doing here? Well I'm playing in a band.' He replied.

- 'In a band? What's your band's name?' she interruted him (comment dit-on 'dit-elle en l'interrompant'?)

- 'wahou! you are in the artistic world, no? What sort of music did you play? What instrument do you play in the band? She said curiously. she looed like interested.

- 'Well, I play guitar and I'm also a singer. But, What about you? Who are you?' he asked.

- 'Oh that's cool, marvellous!' she replied without replying to William.

-' Hum, yes that's fabulous' he answered embarrassed (or ill-at-ease) (il répondit embarassé)

He had been (or he was?) very surprised by so many questions. This unknown woman semmed to be so happy/glad to meet William, that was why he didn't dare to interrupt her on his turn.

- 'How long have you been playing guitar?' she asked

- 'I've been playing guitar for eight years' He replied proudly.

- 'But I don't understand. Were you be a doctor before playing in a band? she asked.

- 'Hum..No I weren't! You must have made a mistake (vous devez vous tromper de personne, je ne sais comment le traduire)

It's not me..' He answered.

-'Yes indeed, you're right, I talked about my husband's friend who ...' she replied for lack of.....(faute de pouvoir s'expliquer)

-'Sorry Miss but I had to join my band before going to the supermarket' He said.

He aswered to her quickly to be free himself from this strange and incomprehensible (understanding?) conversation. Il lui répondit rapidememnt afin de se libérer de cette étrange et incompréhensible conversation...

Je vous enverrai la suite de mon histoire, ainsi vous connaîtrez l'intrigue.Fiona.

[Jean B]

Bonjour Fiona,

Dream you dream (c'est le sujet)

It was a starry night, the big orange flames of a bonfire were dancing in the breeze. It was warm. They were sitting around the fire.

William was playing the guitar, Mary was singing and her wonderful voice echoed <(or resounded?)> in the darkness. The drummers were playing joyfully. Trisha and Merce were turning round to this beautiful music. Their bright eyes and warm smiles illuminated the night; their caravans were in the forest, thanks to the sparkling moon.(??)

In the morning, another destination must be chosen by the caravans. The sun light was shining on the road. It was a good time for the band. They stopped at the beach for a swim. The sea was not cold. Mary sat quietly on the beach because she was eight months pregnant. William was supposed to go and buy some food for Mary (Si je veux dire 'he was supposed to go to a shop to buy some food for her, la construction est-elle bonne? <Certes, mais un peu trop tarabiscotée? Vois ma modification toute simple.)

Then after swimming he went to the nearest supermarket. So he was walking across the road, when a woman came up to him. Worried, he attentively observed the face of this woman. Then he noticed a smile on her face.

- 'Hello! How are you? What are you doing here?' she asked.

- 'Hum. Hello. I'm fine...what am I doing here? Well I'm playing in a band.' He replied.

- 'In a band? What's your band's name?' she said, interrupting him <(comment dit-on 'dit-elle en l'interrompant'?)

- 'wahou! you are in the artistic world, aren't you? What sort of music do you play? What instrument do you play in the band? she said curiously. She looked <like> interested.(to look like = ressembler à > to look + adjectif = avoir l'air + adjectif.)

- 'Well, I play the guitar and I'm also a singer. But, what about you? Who are you?' he asked.

- 'Oh that's cool, marvellous!' she replied without answering William's question.

-' Hum, yes that's fabulous' he answered embarrassed / ill-at-ease (il répondit embarassé)

He was very surprised by so many questions. This unknown woman seemed to be so glad to meet William that he didn't dare to interrupt her in his turn.

- 'How long have you been playing the guitar?' she asked.

- 'I've been playing the guitar for eight years', he replied proudly.

- 'But I don't understand. Weren't you <be> a doctor before playing in a band? she asked.<(le verbe be se sert en quelque sorte d'auxiliaire à lui-même. Inutile donc d'en rajouter !)

- 'Hum..No I wasn't! You must have made a mistake. <(vous devez vous tromper de personne, je ne sais comment le traduire. C'est très bien traduit.)

It's not me..' He answered.

-'Yes indeed, you're right, I talked about my husband's friend who ...' she replied <for lack of...> since she couldn't make herself clear.<(faute de pouvoir s'expliquer)

-'Sorry Miss but I have to join my band before going to the supermarket' He said.

He answered <to> her quickly to <be> free himself from this strange and incomprehensible conversation.

* Pas mal ton histoire.

- Si en français tu sais faire la différence d'emploi entre l'imparfait et le passé simple, ça peut parfois t'aider à faire le choix entre le preterit simple et le preterit continuous.

Ex Ils jouaient, dansaient, chantaient (imparfait) = They were playing, dancing, singing.(preterit continuous)

Il traversait (imparfait) la route quand une jeune femme l'aborda.(passé simple) = He was walking across (preterit continuous) the road when a young woman came up (preterit simple) to him.

[Fiona766]

Bonjour Monsieur,

Je vous remercie beaucoup.

Je comprends parfaitement maintenant la différence entre le prétérit simple et progressif. Pour la suite de mon histoire, je tenterai d'appliquer l'action dans le passé en train de se dérouler de l'autre.

Voyez-vous, quand j'ai un exercice, je ne trompe pas vraiment et quand il s'agit de l'appliquer, je m'aperçois que c'est autre chose.

A bientôt pour la suite de mon histoire. Fiona.

PS: je ne sais pas répondre sans que l'ancien message apparaisse.

Bonjour Fiona,

Dream you dream (c'est le sujet)

It was a starry night, the big orange flames of a bonfire were dancing in the breeze. It was warm. They were sitting around the fire.

William was playing the guitar, Mary was singing and her wonderful voice echoed <(or resounded?)> in the darkness. The drummers were playing joyfully. Trisha and Merce were turning round to this beautiful music. Their bright eyes and warm smiles illuminated the night; their caravans were in the forest, thanks to the sparkling moon.(??)

In the morning, another destination must be chosen by the caravans. The sun light was shining on the road. It was a good time for the band. They stopped at the beach for a swim. The sea was not cold. Mary sat quietly on the beach because she was eight months pregnant. William was supposed to go and buy some food for Mary (Si je veux dire 'he was supposed to go to a shop to buy some food for her, la construction est-elle bonne? <Certes, mais un peu trop tarabiscotée? Vois ma modification toute simple.)

Then after swimming he went to the nearest supermarket. So he was walking across the road, when a woman came up to him. Worried, he attentively observed the face of this woman. Then he noticed a smile on her face.

- 'Hello! How are you? What are you doing here?' she asked.

- 'Hum. Hello. I'm fine...what am I doing here? Well I'm playing in a band.' He replied.

- 'In a band? What's your band's name?' she said, interrupting him <(comment dit-on 'dit-elle en l'interrompant'?)

- 'wahou! you are in the artistic world, aren't you? What sort of music do you play? What instrument do you play in the band? she said curiously. She looked <like> interested.(to look like = ressembler à > to look + adjectif = avoir l'air + adjectif.)

- 'Well, I play the guitar and I'm also a singer. But, what about you? Who are you?' he asked.

- 'Oh that's cool, marvellous!' she replied without answering William's question.

-' Hum, yes that's fabulous' he answered embarrassed / ill-at-ease (il répondit embarassé)

He was very surprised by so many questions. This unknown woman seemed to be so glad to meet William that he didn't dare to interrupt her in his turn.

- 'How long have you been playing the guitar?' she asked.

- 'I've been playing the guitar for eight years', he replied proudly.

- 'But I don't understand. Weren't you <be> a doctor before playing in a band? she asked.<(le verbe be se sert en quelque sorte d'auxiliaire à lui-même. Inutile donc d'en rajouter !)

- 'Hum..No I wasn't! You must have made a mistake. <(vous devez vous tromper de personne, je ne sais comment le traduire. C'est très bien traduit.)

It's not me..' He answered.

-'Yes indeed, you're right, I talked about my husband's friend who ...' she replied <for lack of...> since she couldn't make herself clear.<(faute de pouvoir s'expliquer)

-'Sorry Miss but I have to join my band before going to the supermarket' He said.

He answered <to> her quickly to <be> free himself from this strange and incomprehensible conversation.

* Pas mal ton histoire.

- Si en français tu sais faire la différence d'emploi entre l'imparfait et le passé simple, ça peut parfois t'aider à faire le choix entre le preterit simple et le preterit continuous.

Ex Ils jouaient, dansaient, chantaient (imparfait) = They were playing, dancing, singing.(preterit continuous)

Il traversait (imparfait) la route quand une jeune femme l'aborda.(passé simple) = He was walking across (preterit continuous) the road when a young woman came up (preterit simple) to him.

[Flob]

Salut Fiona,

Pour répondre sans que le message précédent apparaisse, il suffit :

- d'utiliser le "répondre" qui est tout en bas entre "flash" et "nouveau"

-ou d'utiliser le "répondre" qui est tout de suite sous le message auquel tu veux répondre, mais en prenant soin d'effacer tout ce qui apparaît dans l'encadré de réponse (ce qu'il faut effacer se trouve entre 2

)

A plus...

Flob

[Fiona766]

Bonjour Flob,

Merci beaucoup

Je crois que ça marche

Bonne fin de journée. Fiona.