Nirian Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 Signaler Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 Bonjour à tous, je souhaiterais partir en Angleterre cet été pour améliorer mon anglais en travaillant dans un hôtel en tant que serveur, j’ai écrit une lettre de motivation et un CV mais je pense qu'ils doivent contenir des fautes ou des tournures maladroites. Pourriez-vous m’aider à les corriger ? Merci d’avance pour votre aide, bonne journée, Nirian. La lettre de motivation: Citation Dear Madam, Sir, Currently in first year of nurse studies in xxx (France), I am looking for a job in catering or hospitality this summer in July and August 2016 to improve my English. Having worked in the fast-food business, I believe I have gained the organization and seriousness necessary to work in a team. Moreover, working at hospital has taught me to work efficiently and listen to others which is, I think, indispensable in catering trade. Diligent, hardworking and autonomous, I wish to apply to join your business. Please find attached my resume for your review. Besides, I would appreciate the opportunity to speak with you about my interests and qualifications in more detail. Thank you for your time and consideration, xxx xxx Le CV: Citation Profile Address: xxx, FRANCE Telephone: xxx Email: xxx Objective Looking for a two-month summer job in catering trade during July and August 2016, providing professional, efficient, and friendly service in your current organisation to ensure total customer satisfaction. Experiences & Internships Three weeks as hospital assistant at the retirement home of xxx (FRANCE) - 2014 Two month as kitchen assistant and waiter in the McDonald’s of xxx (FRANCE) - 2014 Two weeks as hospital porter at xxx Hospital’s (FRANCE) - 2015 Volunteering : Cleaning a beach with « Initiatives Océanes » at xxx (FRANCE) - 2012 Work Placement : One week in a veterinary clinic in xxx (FRANCE) - 2011 Five weeks as trainee nurse in a rehabilitation unit at xxx's Hospital(FRANCE) - 2015 Five weeks as trainee nurse in an orthopedic unit at xxx (FRANCE) - 2016 Education First year of Nurse studies at Red Cross’ school, 2015-2016 Baccalauréat ST2S (equivalent to BTEC National) with honours, 2015 Brevet des Collèges ( equivalent to general certificate of secondary education),with honours, 2011 Competences Language Skills : French (first language), English (conversational), Spanish (conversational). Computer Skills : Knowledge of Microsoft Office, Apple iWork, Appache OpenOffice. Driving licence References : Available on request La mise en page n'est pas exactement la même que ce que j'ai prévu sur ce site mais ça y ressemble. Merci d'avance!
E-Bahut Jean B Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 E-Bahut Signaler Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 Bonjour, jeune voisin. Dear Sir or Madam, I am currently a first year student nurse in xxx (France) and I am looking for a two-month summer job in catering or hospital services <(???) next July and August 2016 to improve my English. Having worked in the fast-food business and being a serious person, I believe I have gained good organizational skills that are necessary to work in a team. Moreover, working in a hospital has taught me to work efficiently and listen to others, which is indispensable in catering trade. As a diligent, hardworking and autonomous person, I wish to apply to join your business. Please find attached my résumé for your review. Besides, I would appreciate the opportunity to speak with you about my interests and qualifications in more detail. Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours sincerely, signature ================================================================================================================================ Citation Profile Address: xxx, FRANCE Telephone: xxx Email: xxx Objective Looking for a two-month summer job in catering trade during July and August 2016, providing professional, efficient, and friendly service in your current organization to ensure total customer satisfaction. Experience & Internships Three weeks as hospital assistant at the retirement home of xxx (FRANCE) - 2014 Two month as kitchen assistant and waiter in the McDonald’s of xxx (FRANCE) - 2014 Two weeks as hospital porter at xxx Hospital’s (FRANCE) - 2015 Volunteering : Cleaning a beach with « Initiatives Océanes » at xxx (FRANCE) - 2012 Work Placement : One week in a veterinary clinic in xxx (FRANCE) - 2011 Five weeks as trainee nurse in a rehabilitation unit at xxx's Hospital(FRANCE) - 2015 Five weeks as trainee nurse in an orthopedic unit at xxx (FRANCE) - 2016 Education First year of nurse studies at the Red Cross school, 2015-2016 Baccalauréat ST2S (equivalent to BTEC National) with honours, 2015 Brevet des Collèges ( equivalent to General Certificate of Secondary Education),with honours, 2011 Competences Language Skills : French (first language), English (conversational), Spanish (conversational). Computer Skills : Knowledge of Microsoft Office, Apple iWork, Appache OpenOffice. Driving licence References : Available on request Good luck for the summer job!
Nirian Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 Auteur Signaler Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 Merci beaucoup pour ta correction rapide voisin! Je ne voulais pas dire service hospitalier mais hospitalité des hotels je me suis mal exprimé pardon. J'espère trouver rapidement :-)
E-Bahut Jean B Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 E-Bahut Signaler Posté(e) le 30 janvier 2016 Il y a 1 heure, Nirian a dit : Merci beaucoup pour ta correction rapide voisin! Je ne voulais pas dire service hospitalier mais hospitalité des hotels je me suis mal exprimé pardon. J'espère trouver rapidement :-) Qu'entends-tu exactement par " hospitalité des hôtels " ? Jamais rencontré jusqu'à aujourd'hui. Qu'és aco ? S'il s'agit de la restauration hôtelière/en milieu hôtelier, je te propose hotel catering, tout simplement. NB : voir toute petite modification en 1ère ligne cover letter.
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