Corrections Anglais

[dellina]

Bonjour, j'aimerais si l 'on pouvait me corriger mes fautes en anglais je devais décrire deux images mais également les interpreter merci d'avance

The two pictures are extracted from the dystopian novel fahrenheit 451 by Ray bradbury who presents a future American society in which the masses are hedonistic and critical though through reading is outlawed

From the start , we can notice in the middle of the first picture the presence of books write by different writer who received the nobel prize or the success in literature

The books are on fire and disaappear little by little .They are ravaged by the fire.

Indeed , the books mean the intelligence, the knowledge but here they seem to be perceived of an other way since they are burning .

Consequently, this picture clear a beautiful antithesis who oppose the intelligence by the books and, the silliness by the fire

From now on , this picture is slip in two parts .

In the first part, we can suppose that we are in a totalitarian world thanks to the elements caracteristics from ignorance like:the fire in the book, the lack of help as the firemen for put out the fire.

By opposition to the first part , the second party presents a knowledge world with the presence of books and the big name of litterature

In this picture, there is a game color with the light and the darkness.

As to the second picture, in the foreground we see an undulation of the fire who form the smoke , as shown the picture don't brethe by this congestion.

In return It's a big ground of the first picture, it seem to reflect the total disapearrence, of the books then the end of the knowledge

This picture is gloomy ,blackish.

In conclusion those pictures are apocalyptics ,and symbolize the maccarthism but likewise the totalitarianism

[Jean B]

Bonjour,

Ton travail est certes intéressant mais entaché de trop d'erreurs grammaticales que je t'invite à corriger toi-même :

- majuscule aux noms propres

- titres d'ouvrages cités en italique

- omission du déterminant " the " devant les noms employés dans la généralité (il y en a un paquet !)

- forme verbale continue pour décrire une action en cours, présente ou passée

- emploi du bon pronom relatif en fonction de son antécédent

- place de l'adjectif épithète par rapport au nom qu'il qualifie

- de même, la place des 2 noms l'un par rapport à l'autre dans un nom composé de nom + nom n'est pas anodine et obéit à la même règle que j'évoque au dessus

- last but not least, l'adjectif est invariable.

En conséquence, je t'invite à revoir ton texte à la lumière des rappels ci-dessus puis à le remettre en ligne une fois que tu l'auras corrigé.

Si besoin est, aide-toi de ta grammaire.

C'est d'autant plus important pour toi que tu sembles avoir une certaine maîtrise de l'anglais.

Au plaisir de te relire.

[dellina]

The two pictures are extracted from the dystopian novel Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury who presents a future American society in which the masses are hedonistic and critical though through reading is outlawed

From the start , we can notice in the middle of the first picture presence of books write by different writer who received the nobel prize or the success in literature

The books are on fire and disaappear little by little .They are ravaging by the fire.

Indeed , books mean intelligence, knowledge but here they are seeming to be perceived of an other way since they are burning .

Consequently, this picture is clearing a beautiful antithesis which oppose intelligence by books and silliness by fire

From now on , this picture is slip in two parts .

In the first part, we can suppose that we are in a totalitarian world thanks to elements caracteristics from ignorance like:the fire in the book, the lack of help as the firemen for put out the fire.

By opposition to the first part , the second part presents a knowledge world with presence of books and the big's name of litterature

In this picture, there is a game color with light and darkness.

As to the second picture, in the foreground we are seeing a fire's undulation which form smoke , as shown the picture don't brethe by this congestion.

In return It's a big ground of the first picture, it is seeming to reflect the total disapearrence, of books then knowledge's end

This picture is gloomy ,blackish.

In conclusion those pictures are apocalyptics ,and symbolize maccarthism but likewise totalitarianism

[Jean B]

The two pictures are extracted taken from the dystopian novel Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury who presents a future American society in which the masses are hedonistic and critical though through reading is outlawed.

[dellina]

In the first part, we can suppose that we are in a totalitarian world thanks to elements which show ignorance like: the fire in the book, the lack of help as from the firemen to put out the fire.

one presents a knowledge world with presence of books and the famouse names of litterature

In this picture, there is a color game with light and darkness.

As to the second picture, in the foreground we can see an undulation of fire which form smoke : As shown this picture don't breathe

In return it's a close up of the first picture, it seem to reflect the total disapearrence of books then end of knowledge

[Jean B]

Pouce, je passe...

[dellina]

j'ai pas compris j'ai juste corriger les fautes précédentes pourquoi c'est toujours pas bon?

[Jean B]

In the first part, we can suppose that we are in a totalitarian world thanks to elements which show ignorance like: the fire in the book, the lack of help as from the firemen to put out the fire.

one presents a knowledge world with presence of books and the famous names of litterature.

In this picture, there is a color game with light and darkness.

As to the second picture, in the foreground we can see an undulation of fire which formS smoke: As shown this picture don't breathe = non-sens.

In return it's a close up of the first picture, it seemS to reflect the total disappearrence of books then the end of knowledge.