Oral D'anglais

[Cosmopolite]

Bonjour à tous, voilà je viens d'écrire un texte un anglais mais je pense qu'il y a pas mal d'erreurs, quelqu'un pourrait-il m'aider à corriger mes fautes ??

I am an employe in boat company since 3 years. This company is located in Monaco, by the sea, to sell yacht. We buy this boats to a wholesales in St N.

We are 8 employes and a chef executive officer. There is a good atmosphere between all fellow, we are solidarity because we have a common objectif : win lot of money and increase turnover of most shops.

For me, I work as sales assistant, I try to convince customers to buy our boats and I give our clients advices.

Customers are very rich because they are layer, doctors... That's why we had a high price powers.

Indeed, leisure activities are for wealthy people, it'y good for their image.

For example, recently, a young lawyer Menphis, specializing in taxation, phoned for information on our boats. He come from a modest family and he became rich that's why he wants to profit from his money and organised his next vacation with her wife. He has few vacations so he wants everything to be perfect.

Merci beaucoup.

[Jean B]

Bonjour,

Corrections en caractères gras, supprimer ce qui est entre <--> en rouge.

I <am> have been an employee <in> with a boat company <since> for 3 years. This company is located in Monaco, by the sea, to sell yachts. We buy these boats <to> from a wholesales in St Nazaire. <(?)

We are 8 employees and a chief executive officer. There is a good atmosphere between all colleagues/fellows. We <are solidarity> stick together/show solidarity/ because we have a common objective : <win> earn a lot of money and increase the turnover of most shops.

For me, I work as a sales assistant, I try to convince customers to buy our boats and I <give> advise our clients <advices>.

Customers are very rich because they are lawyers, doctors... That's why we have a high price <power> policy.

Indeed, leisure activities are for wealthy people, it'y good for their image.

For example, recently, a young lawyer Menphis, specializing in taxation, phoned for information on our boats. He comes from a modest family and <he> has become rich. That's why he wants to <profit> make the most of <from> his money and organize his next vacation with his wife. He has few vacations so he wants everything to be perfect.

[Cosmopolite]

Merci beaucoup JRB,

Je me suis rendue compte que mon texte était un peu court, c'est pourquoi j'ai rajouté quelques phrases.

Serait-il possible que vous m'aidiez encore un petit peu ?

But he fears his wife refuse to spend these few days on a boat because 2 persons worked in Mitch's firm were casualties of an explosion on a boat. That's why this young lawyer hesitates to buy on of our yacht. So I try to give his a lot of arguments to reassure they and ensure safety.

Merci d'avance.

[Jean B]

But he fears that his wife might refuse to spend these few days on a boat because 2 <persons>(1) people working in Mitch's firm were <casualties of> killed in an explosion on a boat. That's why this young lawyer hesitates to buy one of our yachts. So I try to give him(2) a lot of arguments to reassure them(3) and ensure safety.

(1) Person est surtout employé au singulier, pour ainsi dire jamais au pluriel.

(2) et (3) Tu confonds allègrement les pronoms personnels sujet et complément et les adjectifs possessifs. Une petite révision s'impose.

[Cosmopolite]

C'est vrai, j'ai encore du travail... En tout cas merci pour ton aide.