Fautes à Corriger Svp!

[cafécanelle]

Bonjour, pourriez-vous me coriger mes fautes SVP?

Voici mon travail (J'ai répondu à des question poserdans mon manuel, ce n'est pas une histoire sauf pour le dernier paragraphe, là j'ai rédigé un petit texte)

It can be assumed that Graciela shows a photo of a victim of a kidnapping or a murder to McCaleb. So we can assume that that person is a relative or a dear friend. This hypothesis is supported by the fact that his left hand Graciela wants a portfolio and general pictures of beloved people are placed at this location.

In addition, a misfortune had to get to that person and Graciela has therefore decided to ask for help from McCaleb.

One might think that Graciela's sister was murdered. The killing may have been encouraged by the desire for revenge. Indeed, the sister Graciela is a cardiologist could fail in any of these operations and subsequently a relative of the victim had to want revenge.

At first she tries to convince McCaleb, by the sentiments. That is to say, referring to the solitude of this son of the deceased.

Graciela McCaleb learns that it is his sister who saved his life during his heart operation.

Initially, McCaleb seems interested in the picture because it raises questions. Investigator His instinct takes over.

Then he refuses to help Graciela claiming he no longer works at the FBI. He wants to enjoy his retirement.

Then he allows himself to be picked by pity for the child of the victim, but still refuses. The memories of his childhood and his parents joined him in memories.

Finally it is petrified to learn that the victim was a doctor who had saved his life.

I suppose that McCaleb eventually help Graciela, because he feels the recognition for the victim who had once saved from death.

McCaled was coming down the main dock, past the row of millionaires’ boats, when he saw the woman standing in the stern of The Following Sea. It was half past ten on a Saturday morning and he did not expect a visit. Once it would have been pretty close to it, the woman handed him the hand with a smile.

"Hello, I am Graciela Rivers."

"Enchanted, McCaleb said in shaking hands, and I was Terry… million."

"McCaleb, the cut does, I know the best agent of the FBI. "

"The best former FBI agent, retired, sensing trouble arrived he asked a gruff tone, that you want me?

"You are the only person capable of solving a puzzle that I would like to heart."

"Go straight to the point do you want?"

The woman seemed to lose more and more confidence in it but instead of leaving, she looked in the eye and say:

"A person very dear to my heart, was killed four days ago, the investigation was closed without the identity of the murderer is found, I would ask you to reopen an investigation to find the murderer of this person. So my family and I can finally do his mourning. "

Je vous remercie d'avance!

[yveslouis]

Bonjour.

J'ai apporté quelques modifications à ton texte.

<...> = à supprimer

MAJUSCULES = à ajouter

Je ne comprends pas

It can be assumed that Graciela shows a photo of a victim of a kidnapping or a murder to McCaleb. So we can assume that that person is a relative or a dear friend. This hypothesis is supported by the fact that his left hand Graciela wants a portfolio and general pictures of beloved people are placed at this location.

In addition, a misfortune had to get to that person and Graciela has therefore decided to ask for help from McCaleb.

One might think that Graciela's sister was murdered. The killing may have been encouraged by the desire for revenge. Indeed, the sister Graciela is a cardiologist could fail in any of these operations and subsequently a relative of the victim had to <want> CRY OUT FOR revenge.

At first she tries to <convince> APPEAL TO McCaleb'S FEELINGS <, by the sentiments>. That is to say, referring to the solitude of this son of the deceased(THE DEAD PERSON'S SON ???).

Graciela McCaleb learns that <it is> his sister <who> saved his life during his heart operation.

Initially, McCaleb seems interested in the picture because it raises questions. Investigator His instinct takes over.

Then he refuses to help Graciela claiming he no longer works at the FBI. He wants to enjoy his retirement.

Then he allows himself to be picked by pity for the child of the victim, but still refuses. The memories of his childhood and his parents joined him in memories.

Finally <it> HE is petrified to learn that the victim was <a> THE doctor who had saved his life.

I suppose that McCaleb eventually helpED Graciela, because he feels <the> recognition for the victim who had once saved HIM from death.

McCaled was coming down the main dock, past the row of millionaires’ boats, when he saw the woman standing in the stern of The Following Sea. It was half past ten on a Saturday morning and he did not expect a visit. Once it would have been pretty close to it, the woman <handed> HELD OUT HER HAND TO him <the hand> with a smile.

"Hello, I am Graciela Rivers."

"<Enchanted> HOW DO YOU DO, McCaleb said <in> shaking hands, and I <was> AM Terry… million (???)."

"McCaleb, the cut does, I know the best agent <of> IN the FBI. "

"The best former FBI agent, retired, sensing trouble arrived he asked a gruff tone, that you want me?

"You are the only person capable of solving a puzzle that I would like to heart."

"Go straight to the point <do you want> WILL YOU?"

The woman seemed to <lose more and more confidence in it> BE LESS AND LESS CONFIDENT but instead of leaving, she looked AT HIM STRAIGHT in the eye and <say> SAID:

"A person very dear to my heart, was killed four days ago, the investigation was closed without the identity of the murderer <is> BEING found OUT. I would <ask> LIKE you to reopen an investigation to find the murderer of this person. So my family and I can finally do his mourning. "

@+