Correction D'une Partie De Commentaire

[Shéry]

Coucou à tous !

J'étudie une peinture en anglais et il faut décrire et intérpréter la deuxième partie pour vendredi. Je souhaiterai savoir si il y a des fautes d'orthographe et de grammaire dans ce que j'ai fait. Voici mon pargraphe :

In the middle ground, we are able to observe some children who are aborigines sat in half ring (or circle) around a man dressed in a black costume. This man isn't a aborigine, he is a man of white people.

We can believe that this man is a teacher who teaches children sat in front of him

But, on the second thoughts, we can see that ha doesn't teach a subjet like mathematical or french.

This man is without doubt a priest. Indeed, he is dressed in black cistume with a black hat too.

The children are all dressed in the same way, they carry blue and white clothes.

It's easy to see that this colors represent the white people because the color blue call back the color of the inscription "The people" situated in the top of the painting. That is so whom prove that the white people want to aborigines learnt to become members of their people. One of pupils is standing next to the priest.

He hold in his hand a work and seems read its content. Being given that the man is priest, the book must contain religious texts. The priest teach the religion to the aboriginals children.

this part of the painting represents a other stage of Australian's history. When the white people landed in Australia, they have firstly slaughter thousands of Aborigines. Moreover, they remove the children of their families to take them to the house's white people in order to bring up them and they learn the "white think" to integrate them.

The role of priest is to teach to the children the catholic religion to they adopt the culture of the white people.

To the white people, to bring children with them, away of their parents, is to save them.

Voilà je me doute que c'est bourré de fautes car je ne suis pas forte en anglais ! :S

Merci à ceux qui voudront et pourront m'aider... Car j'aimerai bien m'améliorer...

Bonne journée !

[yveslouis]

Je te propose quelques modifications :

<...> = à supprimer

MAJUSCULES = à ajouter.

In the middle ground, we are able to / WE CAN observe some children who are aborigines <sat> SITTING in half ring (or circle) around a man dressed in a black costume. This man isn't aN aborigine, he is a WHITE man. <of white people>.

We can believe that this man is a teacher who teaches children <sat> SITTING in front of him

But, on <the> second thoughts, we can see that he doesn't teach a subjeCt like <Mathematical> Mathematics or French.

This man is without doubt a priest. Indeed, he is dressed in A black costume with a black hat too.

The children are all dressed in the same way, they <carry> WEAR blue and white clothes.

It's easy to see that <this> THESE coloUrs represent the white people because the BLUE coloUr <blue> <call back> RECALLS the colour of the inscription "The people" situated in the top of the painting. That is <so whom prove> WHAT SHOWS that the white people want <to> THE aborigines TO learn<t> HOW to become members of their people. One of pupils is standing next to the priest.

He hold <in his hand a work> A PAPER IN HIS HANDS and seems TO BE readING its content. Being given that the man is A priest, the book must contain religious texts. The priest IS teachING <the> religion to the aboriginal<s> children.

This part of the painting represents aNother stage of Australian's history. When the white people landed in Australia, they <have> first<ly> slaughterED thousands of Aborigines. Moreover, they removeD the children <of> FROM their families to take them to the house<'>s OF THE white people in order to bring <up> them UP and <they learn> TEACH THEM the "white think" to integrate them.

The role of THE priest is to teach THE CATHOLIC RELIGION to the children <the catholic religion> to <they> adopt the culture of the white people.

<To> FOR the white people, <to> bringING children with them, away <of> FROM their parents, is <to save> SAVING them.

@+ )

[Shéry]

Coucou !

Merci beaucoup d'avoir corriger les fautes ! C'est très gentil de ta part !

Merci encore !!

Bisous.

[yveslouis]

You're welcome!