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Correction Anglais


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#1 Jelicajelica

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Posté 07 décembre 2011 - 16:30

Bonjour est ce que quelqu'un peut me corriger mes phrases  en anglais svp .Merci énormement
I'm sorry I haven't written  before  but I was very busy.
I hope that you feel well today my doll as me it's not my day.
Indeed , since this morning all is bad  and rotten .
Mommy called me at down   and told me that  my sweet uncle Bob died .
I hurried up in the station for take a ticket but it was close because of  bad weather .
On the way back I met my boyfriend John who was with a girl. Walloping, he betray me!
Then we broke up , and since eleven hours I 'm single .
Finally in the afternoon the station reopen , and I could take my ticket.
Unfortunately when I was back to home for make my  suit case , a  foolish boy push me in the  road.
It's now that the worse  nightmare  start .
I was stretched  on the ground in front of a crowd of peoples.
I couldn't move ,I was paralysed .
Then  ambulance come and lead me at the hospital .
I waited 2 hours in the waiting-room .
After all this time , a male nurse  came to me   for medical examination .
And then shock, he told me that i had a  tumor in brain .
Sweetie , I couldn't believe ,I remembered  all our best moments , our parties ,our love at first  sight in Miami .
And I cried a lot of I was desperated , alone in my hospital room.
I was so young for died .
Mommy and Daddy joined me and  comforted me a lot of .
Really vici as you know  I never though that Daddy could be one day here for me .
But the worse is that the male nurse return to the room with a satirical smile and said that I had nothing .
He did  a mitake with an other people.
It was the most worse day of my life really hun , never I 'll forget .
I 'll not disturb you more with my borring storie .
I hope to see you soon and I wish you the best sweetheart!

Modifié par Jelicajelica, 07 décembre 2011 - 16:31.


#2 JRB

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Posté 07 décembre 2011 - 17:18

Bonjour,

Voir le messageJelicajelica, le 07 décembre 2011 - 16:30, dit :

Bonjour,

Est-ce que quelqu'un peut me corriger mes phrases en anglais S.V.P. ? Merci énormement.
I'm sorry I haven't written  before  but I was very busy.
I hope that you feel well today my doll as me it's not my day. ???Image IPB
Indeed, since this morning all is everything has been bad  and rotten .
Mommy called me at dawn and told me that  my sweet uncle Bob had died .
I hurried up in to the station for to buy/take a ticket but it was closed because of  bad weather.
On the way back I met my boyfriend John who was with a girl. Walloping,??? Image IPB he betrays me!
Then we broke up, and ever since eleven hours o'clock I 'mve been single.
Finally in the afternoon the station reopened and I could buy/take my ticket.
Unfortunately when I was on the way back to home for make to pack my  suitcase, a  foolish boy pushed me in onto the  road and that It's is now that the very moment when the worst nightmare started.
I was stretched on the ground in front of a crowd of peoples. I couldn't move, I was paralysed.
Then an ambulance came along and lead drove/took me at to the hospital .
I waited 2 hours in the waiting-room .
After all that/this time, a male nurse  came to me for a medical examination.
And then I was given a nasty shock when he told me that i I had a  tumor in my brain.
Sweetie, I couldn't believe it, I remembered all our best moments, our parties, our love at first  sight in Miami.
And I cried a lot of  I was desperated driven to despair, alone in my hospital room.
I was so young for to died die.
Mommy and Daddy joined me and comforted me a lot of .
Really Vici as you know I never thought that Daddy could be one day here for me.
But the worst thing is that the male nurse returned to the room with a satirical smile on his face and said that I had nothing was wrong with me.
He did  a mitake had mistaken me with for another people person.
It was the most worse worst day of in my life really hun honey,???Image IPB  never I 'll never forget.
I 'll not disturb you more with my boring storiey.
I hope to see you soon and I wish you the best, sweetheart!
Au moins avec toi, on a vite fait de savoir à quoi s'en tenir...Image IPB On est sûr que toutes les fautes à faire, tu les fais consciencieusement.
Tu as intérêt à reprendre toutes les bases le plus sérieusement possible et sans plus tarder.
"Carpe diem!"

#3 Jelicajelica

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Posté 07 décembre 2011 - 19:48

exusez moi mais si  vous corriger les gens pour les critiquer mieux vaut supprimer votre correction j'en veux pas je ne veux plus d'aide venant de vous

#4 JRB

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Posté 08 décembre 2011 - 08:51

À ton aise mais j'ai seulement cru bon de te rendre service en attirant ton attention sur tes lacunes actuelles et à tout faire pour y remédier, c'est tout.
Si tu prends ça pour une critique et ne supportes pas qu'on te le dise, ce n'est pas mon problème.
"Carpe diem!"




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