The idea of progress

[manooon4]

Bonjour j'aimerais qu'on corrige mon devoir et qu'on me donne un avis.

Merci d'avance pour votre aide ! 

INTRODUCTION: The notion I am going to talk about is the notion of idea of progress. This notion can be defined as an improvement, a development or a change like a technical, scientific or social advance which contributes to making the world a better place. However, I am going to deal with medicine breakthrough.

The question I would like to ask is: What are the medical breakthrough and what are the limits?

To begin with I will speak about medical breakthrough, and in a second part I will talk about the ethical problems those breakthrough can raise.

FIRST PART: First of all, in class with my group we learnt about a 12 year old boy that received the first 3D printed vertebra implant. The child from China had a tumor on a spinal cord and he needed an implant. He was the first person ever to receive a 3D printed vertebra implant. 3D printed implants allow to operate on a patient without waiting for a donor, and the advantage is the perfect shape of the implant for any patient because it is custom made for him. 3D printed implants are more and more used in surgery and it allows to push back the medicine limits.

With the other groups I learnt about other breakthroughs. For example, there is a group who worked on a new implant to help a boy hear for the first time. He was the first child in the United States to receive an auditory brain stern implant. The doctor said that boy's sound aware but he doesn't know what the boy hears exactly. His parents said it was the most amazing thing they have ever seen.

The breakthrough which struck me most is the robotic arm, because people like fireman, rescuers, soldiers, or those who help other when they have an accident and lose a limb, have the right to continue to live normally. The robotic limb that they received allows us to live in good conditions. This breakthrough is an advance for mankind because heroes are rewarded.

SECOND PART: Furthermore, in class we also studied transplants and designers babies.

In one hand, suffering from a disease is never easy, transplant is an extraordinary breakthrough for a lot of people. When you are suffering from a cancer, a tumor, a dysfunction or anything, being able to count on an organ transplant or on a 3D organ is a chance for everyone. Today, with medicine we can do unbelievable things which save more people

On the other hand, designer babies are a good thing to treat genetic diseases found in the embryo because the baby can be born without certain illnesses: it allows the baby not to suffer later and this is wonderful. But when people will be able to choose the color of eyes or hair of the baby, it's completely absurd for me, we don't have to choose, our baby is not a doll.

To conclude, those breakthroughs raise ethical questions because some breakthroughs are more expensive and certain people can't pay for them. Indeed, not everybody has the same access to medical care, in class we saw a cartoon where a man bought several transplants but he didn't need them. In reality it is not possible but it shows to everyone that some people can't afford to pay for a transplant.

Furthermore, there are animal organ transplants which exist and not everyone can receive a pork organ because their religion doesn't allow it. To conclude it is not easy to find a solution for everyone.

This topic makes me think about natural remedies: Can they be an alternative or a complement to medical progress?

[Jean B]

Bonsoir,

Re bonjour, j'ai repris mon travail et j'aimerais < conditionnel dit de politesse que quelqu'un corrige les petits changements (pas grand’ chose hein) que j'ai faits < accord avec le COD placé avant pour être sûre de moi! Merci par avance ! < Même si certaines de ces fautes de grammaire et d’orthographe ne se remarquent pas à l’oral, toutes le seront immanquablement à l’écrit. Tu voudras bien pardonner un vieux de la vieille, c’est plus fort que moi.

INTRODUCTION: The notion I am going to talk about is the notion of idea of progress. This notion can be defined as an improvement, a development or a change like a technical, scientific or social advance which contributes to making the world a better place. However, I am going to deal with medicine breakthroughs.

The question I would like to ask is: Are all medical breakthroughs a form of progress?

To begin with I will speak about medical breakthroughs which are a form of progress and in a second part I will talk about the ethical problems those breakthroughs can raise.

FIRST PART: First of all, in class with my group we learnt about a 12 year old boy who that received the first 3D printed vertebra implant. The child from China had a tumor on a spinal cord and he needed an implant. He was the first person ever to receive a 3D printed vertebra implant. 3D printed implants allow to operate on a patient without waiting for a donor, and the advantage is the perfect shape of the implant for any patient because it is custom made for him. 3D printed implants are more and more used in surgery and it they allows to push back the medicine limits.

With the other groups I learnt about other breakthroughs. For example, there is a group who worked on a new implant to help a boy hear for the first time. He was the first child in the United States to receive an auditory brain stern implant. The doctor said that the boy is sound aware but he doesn't know what the boy hears exactly. His parents said it was the most amazing thing they have ever seen.

The breakthrough which struck me most is the robotic arm because people like fireman, < le pluriel SVP ! rescuers, soldiers, or those who help other < idem when they have an accident and lose a limb, have the right to continue to live normally. The robotic limb that they received allows us < nous ne sommes pas concernés ! Rectifie  to live in good conditions. This breakthrough is an advance for mankind because heroes are rewarded.

Today, with medicine we can do unbelievable things which save more people and those breakthroughs are some examples.

SECOND PART: Furthermore, in class we also studied designer babies. < Attention : pas de -s à designer It's a good thing to treat genetic diseases found in the embryo because the baby can be born without certain illnesses: it allows the baby not to suffer later and this is wonderful. But when people will be able to choose the colour of eyes or hair of the baby, it's completely absurd for me, we don't have to choose, our baby is not a doll. 

Moreover, some breakthroughs are more expensive and certain people can't pay for them. Indeed, not everybody has the same access to medical care, in class we saw a cartoon where a man bought several transplants but he didn't need them. It may sound like science fiction but organ harvesting has become a booming business today. In reality, it is not possible to buy several transplants without needing them but it shows to everyone that some people can't afford to pay for a transplant.

Furthermore, there are animal organ transplants which exist and not everyone can receive a pork organ because their religion doesn't allow it.

To conclude, today, with medicine we can do unbelievable things which save more people and some breakthroughs are a form of progress because it improve < les accords avec le sujet pluriel ”some breakthroughs” ? medicine. However certain breakthroughs are harmful when people diverts < Aïe, people est un pluriel ! their use. < Je te rappelle qu'un -s superflu s'entendra à l'oral et se remarquera forcément à l'écrit.

This topic makes me think about natural remedies: Can they be an alternative or a complement to medical progress?

Si j’excepte quelques étourderies ou plutôt fautes d’inattention, ton anglais est globalement bon.

Bonne chance pour ton oral.

[manooon4]

Bonjour, voici mon texte corrigé. Je m'excuse de ces petites erreurs que j'aurai pu rectifier seule mais a force d'avoir le nez dessus on ne remarque plus rien! Pourriez vous relire rapidement ma correction pour vérifier qu'il ne reste pas de petites erreurs qui me coûterai un demi point de perdu bêtement? Merci beaucoup pour votre aide ! 

INTRODUCTION: The notion I am going to talk about is the notion of idea of progress. This notion can be defined as an improvement, a development or a change like a technical, scientific or social advance which contributes to making the world a better place. However, I am going to deal with medicine breakthrough.

The question I would like to ask is: Are all medical breakthroughs a form of progress?

To begin with I will speak about medical breakthroughs which are a form of progress, and in a second part I will talk about the ethical problems those breakthroughs can raise.

FIRST PART: First of all, in class with my group we learnt about a 12 year old boy who received the first 3D printed vertebra implant. The child from China had a tumor on a spinal cord and he needed an implant. He was the first person ever to receive a 3D printed vertebra implant. 3D printed implants allow to operate on a patient without waiting for a donor, and the advantage is the perfect shape of the implant for any patient because it is custom made for him. 3D printed implants are more and more used in surgery and they allow to push back medicine limits.

With the other groups I learnt about other breakthroughs. For example, there is a group who worked on a new implant to help a boy hear for the first time. He was the first child in the United States to receive an auditory brain stern implant. The doctor said that the boy is sound aware but he doesn't know what the boy hears exactly. His parents said it was the most amazing thing they have ever seen.

The breakthrough which struck me most is the robotic arm, because people like firemans, rescuers, soldiers, or those who help others when they have an accident and lose a limb, have the right to continue to live normally. The robotic limb that they received allows them to live in good conditions. This breakthrough is an advance for mankind because heroes are rewarded.

Today, with medicine we can do unbelievable things which save more people and those breakthroughs are some examples.

SECOND PART: Furthermore, in class we also studied designer babies. It's a good thing to treat genetic diseases found in the embryo because the baby can be born without certain illnesses: it allows the baby not to suffer later and this is wonderful. But when people will be able to choose the colour of eyes or hair of the baby, it's completely absurd for me, we don't have to choose, our baby is not a doll. 

Moreover, some breakthroughs are more expensive and certain people can't pay for them. Indeed, not everybody has the same access to medical care, in class we saw a cartoon where a man bought several transplants but he didn't need them. It may sound like science fiction but organ harvesting has become a booming business today. In reality, it is not possible to buy several transplants without needing them but it shows to everyone that some people can't afford to pay for a transplant.

Furthermore, there are animal organ transplants which exist and not everyone can receive a pork organ because their religion doesn't allow it.

To conclude, today, with medicine we can do unbelievable things which save more people and some breakthroughs are a form of progress because they improve medicine. However certain breakthroughs are harmful when people divert their uses.

This topic makes me think about natural remedies: Can they be an alternative or a complement to medical progress?

[Jean B]

Lis ma réponse à la suite de "Spaces & exchanges", elle s'applique aussi à ce sujet.