Correction devoir

[Salssabil]

Bonjour/soir J’ouvre ce sujet car j'ai un PTA( projet technologique accompagné ) et j'ai une partit a traduire en anglais cette note aura un gros impacte sur ma note de baccalauréat j'ai déjà traduit une parti je vous le transmet afin que me corriger et que vous me donniez votre avis merci d’avance pour votre aide

We chose the toxic shock as subject of accompanied technological project because it is a topical subject and a social issue which concerns the women, that is 49.6 % of the population. In France, there are even doctors who do not know the existence of the TSS, sometimes badly to diagnose or to diagnose as a STD.

Knowing that there is no in-depth study, with results(profits) or answers which can answer our questions, on the impact of buffers(stamps) on the health of the women while they use on average 11 000 buffers(stamps) in their life. It is thus the rather new subject which was still never treated. It is the big taboo which we would like to break. We would also like to make the message pass with regard to(compared with) the risks of the TSS and the buffers(stamps).

The Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS) is a rare infectious disease, caused by a bacterial toxin, called TSST-1, produced by Staphylococcus aureus. The TSS can arrive when an expanding woman of this bacterium uses a tampon, in particular of great "type absorbing" during her rules. According to certain searches, 20 to 30 % of the women are carriers of the S. aureus among whom 5 % develops a toxin.

[Jean B]

Bonsoir,

Il y a 19 heures, Salssabil a dit :

Bonjour/soir

J’ouvre ce sujet car j'ai un PTA( projet technologique accompagné ) et dont j'ai une partie à traduire en anglais. Nouvelle phrase >  Cette note aura un gros impacte sur ma note de baccalauréat. Nouvelle phrase > J'ai déjà traduit une partie que je vous le transmets afin que me corrigiez et (que vous) me donniez votre avis. Nouvelle phrase > Merci d’avance pour votre aide. < La correction du français est donnée également à titre gracieux. Bescherelle, au secours !

We chose the toxic shock syndrome as a subject of accompanied technological project because it is a topical subject and a social issue which concerns the women, that is 49.6 % of the population. In France, there are even doctors who do not know the existence of the TSS, sometimes badly to diagnose it or to diagnose it as a STD.

Knowing We know that there is no in-depth study, with results (profits) or answers which can answer our questions, on the impact of buffers (stamps)  menstrual tampons (1) on the health of the women while they use an average 11 000 buffers(stamps) in their lives. It is thus the a  rather new subject which was still has never been dealt with/treated so far. It is the big taboo which we would like to break. We would also like to make pass on the message pass with regards to (compared with) the risks of the TSS and the buffers(stamps) tampons.

(1) Quel dictionnaire bilingue utilises-tu ? Quand tu doutes d'une traduction, il faut aller vérifier l'acception adéquate du mot dans la partie anglais-français.

Ainsi tu aurais vu que " buffers " ce sont les tampons amortisseurs ou butoirs des wagons de chemin de fer, donc rien à voir avec le sujet.

The Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS) is a rare infectious disease, caused by a bacterial toxin, called TSST-1, produced by Staphylococcus aureus. The TSS can arrive start/occur when an expanding woman a carrier of this bacterium uses a tampon, in particular of " highly absorbent type " during her rules periods. According to certain research, 20 to 30 % of the women are carriers of the S. aureus among whom 5 % develops a toxin.

Attention aux règles d'emploi/omission du déterminant " the ", il faut les revoir afin de les maîtriser.

Bonne continuation.

 

[Salssabil]

Merci beaucoup de m'avoir corriger je tiendrais compte de vos commentaires voici la fin de mon devoir :

We made 3 hypothesis:

- Is the toxic shock caused(provoced) by the hygienic protections?

- Does the time(weather) of the port(bearing) of menstrual tampons influence the toxic shock?

- Does the toxic shock concern all the women?

So we made 2 experiences(experiments)

- influence hygienic protections on the bacterial proliferation; to determine if the hygienic protections are the cause of the Toxic Shock Syndrome, we verified their actions on Staphylococcus aureus in intervals of different times, that is at the end of 2 hours, 5 hours, and 8 hours. Then, we made enumerations.

look for aureus S. at the voluntary women: this experience(experiment) allowed us to verify if all the women are carriers of Staphylococcus aureus. For that purpose, we gave, to voluntary women, various buffers(stamps)

So for it is menstrual tampons we used Buffer(Stamp), sanitary towel, pork's(pig) blood and for the gélose of the broth Chapman.

[Jean B]

We made 3 hypotheses: < forme du pluriel

- Is the toxic shock caused/provoked by the hygienic sanitary protections?

- Does the time (weather) of the port (bearing) of the length of time women wear menstrual tampons influence the toxic shock?

- Does the toxic shock concern all the women?

So we made 2 experiences experiments:

- influence hygienic sanitary protections on the bacterial proliferation; to determine if the hygienic protections are the cause of the Toxic Shock Syndrome, we verified their actions on Staphylococcus aureus in intervals of different times, that is after/at the end of/ 2 hours, 5 hours, and 8 hours. Then, we made enumerations.

look for aureus S. at the on voluntary women: this experience experiment allowed us to check/verify if all the women are carriers of Staphylococcus aureus. For that purpose, we gave, to voluntary women various buffers(stamps) <<< Il paraît que tu tiens compte de mes annotations ???

So for it is menstrual tampons we used Buffer(Stamp), sanitary towel, pork's(pig) blood and for the gélose of the broth Chapman. <<< C'est incompréhensible.

Conseil : écris directement en anglais sans passer d'abord par le français ! Pour cela, compose des phrases simples : sujet + verbe + complément(s) et basta ! Tu y gagneras en clarté d'expression et ton examinateur/professeur ne risquera pas de perdre ses nerfs.

[Salssabil]

Merci beaucoup je prend notre de ton conseil c'est vrai que je n'ai jamais pensé a commencer directement par l'anglais merci de m'avoir aider je ne saurait te prouver ma reconnaissance j’étais vraiment dans l’angoisse permanente mer encore