Correction

[azertyuiop30]

Bonjour,

Pendant les vacances, mon professeur d'anglais m'a demandé d’écrire une lettre à ma meilleure amie où je dois lui annoncer que je viens d'apprendre que je suis noire (sachant que j'ai 15 ans au moment des faits).

Pouvez-vous corriger ce que j'ai fait et me dire ce que vous en avez pensé ?

Voici mon travail:

I’m sorry I haven’t written earlier, but if (I’m writing) this letter today It’s to confide you something which presses on my heart... I discovered that my grandmother Nan is black what consequently means that I too am black! Black! I’m BLACK, BLACK, BLACK! Do you hear? Not that I have never noticed that I was black (physically speaking), I know that I have the skin black, but maintaining that I blew my fifteen candles, I attach bigger one importance for this word. Oh Julie! As I wish you were by my side, to help me to through this painful stage of my life... If you were with me, you would tell me not to carry so much importance to this history of colour, but how not to do? For many decades the blacks were discriminated and today still, discrimination toward persons of colour persists. Oh Julie! I don't even dare think about my future …. You know how many black people have seen doors to close, even before being before them? All this is so unfair! I would so much like to become again the naive girl I was... Julie, I didn’t see who else send this letter apart from you my best friend. What should I do according to you? How should I react face to what happens to me? I so much need you today...

I look forward to your letter.

XOXOXO

Sally.

Merci d'avance pour votre généreuse aide.

Cordialement.

azertyuiop30

[Jean B]

Bonsoir,

Dear Julie,

I’m sorry I haven’t written earlier, but if I’m writing this letter doing so today It’s to confide you share something which presses on my heart... I discovered that my grandmother Nan is black, what which consequently means that I too am black too!<Après la virgule, which résume la proposition qui précède = ce qui/ce que. C'est à mémoriser. Black! I’m BLACK, BLACK, BLACK! Do you hear? Not that I have never noticed that I was black (physically speaking), I know that I have the my skin is black, but maintaining now that I blew have blown out my fifteen candles, I attach bigger one importance for to this word. Oh Julie! As How I wish you were by my side to help me to get through this painful stage of my life... If you were with me, you would tell me not to carry attach so much importance to this history matter of colour, but how not to do so? For many decades the blacks were discriminated and today still, discrimination toward persons of colour still persists. Oh Julie! I don't even dare think about my future …. Do you know how many black people have seen doors to close, even before being before in front of them? All this is so unfair! I would so much like to become again the naive girl I was... Julie, I didn’t see whom else I could send this letter to apart from you my best friend. What should I do according to you? How should I react face to faced with what happens to me? I so much need you so much today...<Rien ne doit s'intercaler entre le pronom sujet et le verbe.

I look forward to reading your answer/letter/hearing from you,

XOXOXO

Sally.

Au risque de me tromper, l'emploi de "maintaining" pour rendre "maintenant" a un fort relent de traducteur automatique. Si c'est le cas, je t'engage à oublier ce genre de sottise pour faire fonctionner tes méninges et ton dictionnaire. Si ce n'est pas le cas, alors je te présente mes plus humbles excuses.

Ceci étant dit, ton anglais est plutôt agréable à lire.

Bonne continuation et bonnes vacances.

[azertyuiop30]

Merci beaucoup pour votre aide et non je ne l'ai pas fait avec internet mais comme je l'ai fini tard, j'avais un peu la tête fatiguée et ça a pu se constater

Encore merci à vous!