Correction Expression Écrite

[Sahel]

Bonjour,

Alors voilà pour la rentrée j'ai une petite expression écrite à faire en Anglais d'environ 250 mots.

J'ai quasiment fini, il ne me reste plus que la conclusion à faire- mais avant j'aimerai, grâce à votre immeeense bonté hihi, pouvoir corriger ce que j'ai déjà pu faire. Voilà, merci beaucoup!

Sujet de l'expression : Commenter & réagir sur le slogan de cette récente couverture du Time Magazine montrant Oscar Pistorius "Man, Superman,Gunman"

Et voici ce que j'ai écrit(pour l'instant) :

For its 90 years, the famous Time Magazine chose Oscar Pistorius to make the cover. We can see him bare-chared with the visible legs in prosthesis of carbon with the following title : " Man,Superman,Gunman" describing the hero's fall.

But who is really Oscar Pistorius? And why do we speak about " a superman"? " a gunman "?

First of all, it's necessary to know that Oscar Pistorius is famous because he is a South African sprint runner who is amputated by both shins. As a matter of factn before night from 13 till 14 February, Pistorius was known to be the first paralympic athlete to have participated last summer in the Olympics with the valids. Thereby, the called "the blade runner" was considered as a national hero in South Africa. He aroused the admiration because, in spite of his handicap, he became a "big" athlete (= un grand athlète?" )

Nonetheless, today We speak about him - not as a hero - but as a "gunman". Indeed, since February 14th, he is charged with the murder of his partner Reeva Steenkamp, whom he had fatally shot at his home in the early hours of that morning. He was granted bail 8 days later and must be appear before court in June 2013.

To sum up, evinf if the case is pending, this event shows..(c'est la conclusion que je n'ai pas encore faite hihi)

Voilà, merci beaucoup!!

[Jean B]

Bonjour,

Sujet de l'expression : Commenter & réagir sur le slogan de cette récente couverture du Time Magazine montrant Oscar Pistorius "Man, Superman, Gunman"

For On the occasion of its 90 years ninetieth anniversary, the famous Time Magazine chose Oscar Pistorius to make the illustrate its cover. <Ta formulation n'est pas vraiment mauvaise mais elle sent trop le français traduit. We can see him bare-charedchested with the visible legs in prosthesis of wearing his carbon prostheses with the following title:< -torse = chest Relis-toi toujours !

- prosthesis = singulier <---> prostheses = pluriel " Man, Superman, Gunman" describing the hero's fall. < espace après la virgule.

But who is really Oscar Pistorius? And why do we speak about is he called " a superman"? " a gunman "?

First of all, it's necessary to know that Oscar Pistorius is famous because he is a South African sprint runner who is has had both lower legs amputated by both shins. As a matter of fact prior to/before the night from of 13 till to 14 February, Pistorius was known to be the first paralympic athlete to have participated last summer in the Olympics with the valids able-bodied athletes. Thereby the called "the blade runner" was considered regarded as a national hero in South Africa. He aroused the admiration <" the " est omis devant un nom employé dans la généralité because, in spite of his handicap, he became a "big" great athlete (= un grand athlète?" ) <Si tu disposes d'un dictionnaire, t'arrive-t-il de le consulter ?

Nonetheless, today We speak he is talked about him today - not as a hero - but as a "gunman". Indeed, since February 14th, he is charged with the murder of his partner Reeva Steenkamp whom he had fatally shot at his home in the early hours of that morning. He was granted bail 8 days later and must be appear before court in June 2013.

To sum up, evin if the case is pending, this event shows..(c'est la conclusion que je n'ai pas encore faite hihi)

Voilà, merci beaucoup!!

[Sahel]

D'accord, merci beaucoup pour la correction et le conseil!

Au revoir