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Correction Rapide Svp

courte expression écrite

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#1 Bibiss

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Posté 30 octobre 2011 - 21:56

Nous devons écrire un article de journal en anglais traitant d'un débat réalisé en cours entre les différents élèves à propos de l'égalité homme/femme de nos jours dans nos pays. Un groupe d'élève disant que les femmes sont aujourd'hui égales aux hommes, l'autre groupe défendant le contraire. Nous devons faire un minimum de 200 mots.
J'ai déjà effectué le travail mais j'ai peur d'avoir fait quelques fautes.


THE CONTROVERSIAL DEBATE :

Yesterday the polemic debate about the women egality took place. Two sides were fighting. The YES and the NO. The first was composed of Alexis, Quentin, Mehdi and Melissa and the second was composef of Ronan, Stéphanie, Clémentine and Billel. They offered us a very lively debate with more or less good armugents. The YES team talked a lot of famous men who do not respect women. By example they mentioned DSK or Berlusconi. Their opponents did not know what answe. Maybe they should have said than they are just special cases. Furthermore the YES said than women were not enough represented in gouvernements in Europe. Indeed almost every president or prime minister are men but they are elected, so it is the people in general who maybe trust easily in men than in women. After they used bad argument, they talked about the lot of girls in the poor country who have not the right to study. That's true, everyone agrees but the subject is our country, it means in Europe or USA. Moreover they said than women have got the right to vote long time after men. Once more this is not the subject! Everyboy knows that but we are talking about today! Finally we can't say who has won, but it was very close.


Merci.

#2 JRB

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Posté 31 octobre 2011 - 18:31

Bonsoir,

Avant tout, une salutation est toujours préférable car tu t'adresses à des êtres humains ici, pas à des robots.
Merci d'y penser à l'avenir.

Voir le messageBibiss, le 30 octobre 2011 - 21:56, dit :

Nous devons écrire un article de journal en anglais traitant d'un débat réalisé en cours entre les différents élèves à propos de l'égalité homme/femme de nos jours dans nos pays. Un groupe d'élève disant que les femmes sont aujourd'hui égales aux hommes, l'autre groupe défendant le contraire. Nous devons faire un minimum de 200 mots.
J'ai déjà effectué le travail mais j'ai peur d'avoir fait quelques fautes.


THE CONTROVERSIAL DEBATE :

Yesterday the polemical debate about the women equality took place. Two sides were fighting. The YES and the NO. The first was composed of Alexis, Quentin, Mehdi and Melissa and the second was composef ??? of Ronan, Stéphanie, Clémentine and Billel. They offered us a very lively debate with more or less good armugents. The YES team talked a lot of about famous men who do not respect women. By For example they mentioned DSK or Berlusconi. Their opponents did not know what to answer. Maybe they should have said than they are just special cases. Furthermore the YES said than that women were not enough represented in European governments in Europe.
Donne-toi la peine de vérifier l'orthographe des mots transparents dans le dictionnaire ; il ne te mordra pas !Image IPB  

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Indeed almost every president or prime minister are men but they are elected, so it is the people in general who maybe trust more easily in men than in women. After they used bad argument, they talked about the a lot of girls in the poor countries who have not the right to study.
Révise sérieusement les cas d'omission et d'emploi du déterminant " the ". C'est essentiel en anglais.

Citation

That's true, everyone agrees but the subject is our country, it means in Europe or the USA. Moreover they said than Image IPB  women have got the right to vote a long time after men. Once more this is not the subject! Everyboy knows that but we are talking about today! Finally we can't say who has won, but it was very close.

Merci.
Te rends-tu compte que tu confonds régulièrement than et that ? Guéris-toi !Image IPB
"Carpe diem!"

#3 Bibiss

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Posté 06 novembre 2011 - 19:11

Merci beaucoup, et promis je révise l'emploi de " the " :)




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