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[piakchouky]

Bonjour à tous !


Je suis nouvelle sur le forum et j'aurai besoin de vos lumières.

Voilà deux semaines que je rédige un exposé sur la façon dont les enseignants sont représentés dans les films américains. J'ai enfin fini (et il était temps, je passe à l'oral jeudi :'( ) mais cela fait pas mal de temps que je n'ai pas écrit d'anglais, du coup, je doute un peu de mes formulations.

Je sais que mon texte est un peu long mais j'aurais aimé savoir si vous pouviez me donner votre avis sur la rédaction et pourquoi pas le contenu: si vous ne comprenez pas une idée, si vous pensez que je pourrais améliorer telle ou telle idée...tous commentaires sont les bienvenus.

C'est un exposé oral, je vais présenter le texte tel quel. J'ai mis en gras les formulations dont je ne suis vraiment pas sure.

Merci d'avance !

Gabrielle




Introduction
As you could guess, my presentation is about teachers and more especially about how teachers are represented in Americans movies.
So, I choose 4 movies about the relationship between teachers and students and I'm going show you what these movies have in common about the way that teachers are represented.

Presentation films
I'm going to summarize the story of each movie but very quickly because my presentation isn't really about the story of the films but it's more about the attitude of the teachers and how they behave with their students (comment ils se comportment avec les étudiants).

So, the first one, Dead Poets Society brings out (sorti) in 1989. The character, plays by Robbie Williams, is a literature teacher in a very strict school where there are only boys.

Dangerous Minds is the second movie that I choose. It brings out in 1995. This film is about a women who use to be a marine and who find a job as a teacher in a high school where the students are very undisciplined. Michelle Pfeiffer plays the teacher.

The next movie is The Ron Clark Story brings out in 2006. Matthew Perry plays the main character, a new teacher in junior high school. The class room that he chooses is very difficult and every teacher who had taught in this class had finally quit their job.

And finally, the last movie is Freedom writers brings out in 2007. It's the film that we were talking about last week and which is has been made by Clean Eastwood. The movie is with Hilary Swank who plays the main character, a English teacher. She plays a young woman who picks her first job as a teacher in a very difficult school. She has a class in which the students are members of opposite gangs.

Plan
First of all, I'm going focus on the personalities of the teachers on these movies. Then I'm going to talk to you about how teachers had influenced the life of their students.



Partie I = Personalities of the teachers
So, how these teachers are presented?

First, the teachers believe on their teaching assignment and it's like that their job is everything for them.
In Freedom Witers, at the beginning of the film, the teacher, Ms Gruwell said to the director that the real fight against the delinquency should happen in the classroom. And she also said that if she choose this difficult school it's because she believes that teachers can change the détermined future of the students.
Besides, Ms Gruwell spends all of her free time on preparing her classroom which annoy a lot a husband who thinks that she puts too much oh herself in her job.

In Dead Poets Society, Mr Keatting, the literature teacher, left his wife in London because he loves teaching and especially in this school in the USA.


Then, the second characteristic of these teacher is that they believe on the potential of their students
In the Ron Clark story, there is a scene in wich the teacher Ron Clark and the director of the school are arguying about what the students have to learn The director upholds that the only thing that is all matters is that the students pass. Ron Clark disagrees with that and said that not only his students are going to pass but also they are going to have greats results to the final exam.
Ron Clark defends his students because he knows that they are clever and they can learned more than the minimum and they can achieve more than the director thinks.

In Dangerous Minds, at the beginning the teacher Louanne Johnson plays by Michelle Pfeiffer, is very disappointed because she tought that she is going to have a class of brilliant students and she finally have a class with students who don't even care to be in school. But, few time after, she starts to realize that some of these students are really intelligent and that she can learn something to her class.

In the Dead Poets Society, Mr Keating, the teacher plays by Robbie Williams encourages one of his students to continue his passion for acting and this even if the father of this student disagree with that.
Mr Keating doesn't want that his student had troubles (ne veut pas que son étudiant ait des ennuis) but he thinks that his students should do what they make them happy.


Partie 2 = What achieve these teachers?

So now, we are going to see what these teachers with their students.

The teachers succeed in been respected by their students.
Excepted in the movie Dead Poets Society, the schools where the students are are difficult. So at the beginning of each movies, the students don't care about leaning and the teachers, they are insolent and they are always chatting making a huge noise. But the teachers don't give up and captivate the students' attention with activities that motivated the students. The teachers finally win the respect from their students not because they are authoritarian or strict but because they have find a way to do something witch interest the students meanwhile they learn "real stuffs".

Thanks to teachers, the students have a different image of school. They have been interesting in learning because the teachers had used original methods.

For example, in the Ron Clark Story, Ron Clark made a rap song for his students in order for them to learn all of the 42 presidents of the united States. And so, with those games, the students have memorized easily and with fun the united states history. The students of Ron Clark not only pass at the end of the year but also they have the best grades of all the class of their level.

In the Dead Poets Society, Mr Keatting gives to his students an other image of the poetry. For him poetry isn't not something that you can learned in a book, in a academic way. For Mr Keatting poetry is something that we feel with passion. And to illustrate the way he thinks, he made his students rip out pages of their book which give a rigid method to learn poetry.

In Freedoms writers, Ms Gruwell made realized her students that if they want to cope their suburb life, with fights between gangs, they have to succeed in school to have a chance to go to college and give up their actual difficult life.
The students get to liking the writing in reading stories who looks like theirs and in writing theirs own history.




Conclusion

To conclude, we can say that the problematic of these movies is always "how to make the students learned?" and so the teachers are represented with a positive image because they do whatever they can to make the students leaned. The teachers love their job, there a good educationalist. In fact, the teachers are being seen both as educators and mediators.
Educator because the teachers learn things to students like grammar or mathematics and mediator because they deal with conflict with students between each other or with conflict with the parents.

However, the teachers are a little idealizing. They are be seen like heroes who have to save all the students which are difficult and who none want to teach to them.

[nonosse]

Bonjour,
J'ai vu que quelques erreurs se sont glissées dans ton texte, que je vais corriger entre parenthèses :
Introduction
As you could guess, my presentation is about teachers and more especially about how teachers are represented in Americans (pas de s, c'est un adjectif) movies.
So, I choose (chose = j'ai choisi, c'est un verbe irrégulier) 4 movies about the relationship between teachers and students and I'm going (to) show you what these movies have in common about the way that teachers are represented.

Presentation films
I'm going to summarize the story of each movie but very quickly because my presentation isn't really about the story of the films but it's more about the attitude of the teachers and how they behave with their students (comment ils se comportment avec les étudiants).

So, the first one, Dead Poets Society brings out (sorti) in (si c'est au passé = brought out) 1989. The character, plays (played) by Robbie Williams (hum, Robin Williams parce que Robbie c'est le chanteur), is a literature teacher in a very strict school where there are only boys (tu peux dire une pension pour garçons = a boarding school for boys).

Dangerous Minds is the second movie that I choose (idem, chose). It brings out (idem) in 1995. This film is about a women who use (used : passé !) to be a marine and who find (finds, si c'est présent mais found si c'est passé) a job as a teacher in a high school where the students are very undisciplined. Michelle Pfeiffer plays the teacher.

The next movie is The Ron Clark Story brings out in 2006 (attention, cette phrase a 2 verbes : dis "the next movie, Ron..., brought out" ou "the next movie is ... and it brought out ..."). Matthew Perry plays the main character, a new teacher in junior high school. The class room (classroom c'est une salle de classe, dis class pour classe) that he chooses is very difficult and every teacher who had taught in this class had finally quit (j'aurais mis left à la place de quit) their job.

And finally, the last movie is Freedom writers brings out in 2007 (idem). It's the film that we were talking about last week and which is has been made by Clean Eastwood (aïe, "and which was made by ..."). The movie is with Hilary Swank who plays the main character, a (an) English teacher. She plays a young woman who picks her first job as a teacher in a very difficult school. She has a class in which the students are members of opposite gangs.

Plan
First of all, I'm going (TO) focus on the personalities of the teachers on these movies. Then I'm going to talk to (I'm going to TELL YOU about) you about how teachers had influenced the life of their students.



Partie I = Personalities of the teachers
So, how these teachers are presented? (How are these teachers ... ?)

First, the teachers believe on their teaching assignment and it's like that (pas that) their job is everything for them.
In Freedom Witers, at the beginning of the film, the teacher, Ms Gruwell said to the director that the real fight against the delinquency should happen in the classroom. And she also said that if she choose (chooseS : 3ème personne) this difficult school it's because she believes that teachers can change the détermined future of the students.
Besides, Ms Gruwell spends all of her free time on preparing her classroom which annoy(S) a lot a(her) husband who thinks that she puts too much oh (on) herself in her job.

In Dead Poets Society, Mr Keatting, the literature teacher, left his wife in London because he loves teaching and especially in this school in the USA.


Then, the second characteristic of these teacher is that they believe on the potential of their students
In the Ron Clark story, there is a scene in wich the teacher Ron Clark and the director (headmaster parce que director c'est réalisateur de films) of the school are arguying about what the students have to learn The director (idem) upholds that the only thing that is all matters is that the students pass. Ron Clark disagrees with that and said that not only his students are going to pass but also they are going to have greats results to the final exam.
Ron Clark defends his students because he knows that they are clever and they can learned more than the minimum and they can achieve more than the director thinks. (tu dis trop de and ... and... = coupe)

In Dangerous Minds, at the beginning the teacher Louanne Johnson plays (played) by Michelle Pfeiffer, is very disappointed because she tought that she is (was) going to have a class of brilliant students and she finally have (has) a class with students who don't even care to be in school. But, few time after, she starts to realize that some of these students are really intelligent and that she can learn something to her class (attention, c'est les élèves qui "learn", elle, elle "teaches").

In the Dead Poets Society, Mr Keating, the teacher plays (played) by Robbie (Robin) Williams encourages one of his students to continue his passion for acting and this even if the father of this student disagree(S) with that.
Mr Keating doesn't want that his student had troubles (ne veut pas que son étudiant ait des ennuis= doen't want his student to get into trouble) but he thinks that his students should do what they make them happy (what makes them happy).


Partie 2 = What achieve these teachers?
(what does the teachers achieve ?)
So now, we are going to see what these teachers (? il manque un verbe ici) with their students.

The teachers succeed in been (beING) respected by their students.
Excepted in the movie Dead Poets Society, the schools (pas de s) where the students are are difficult. So at the beginning of each movies (each movie), the students don't care about lea®ning and the teachers, they (the teachers are) are insolent and (trop de and) they are always chatting(ajoute une virgule ou coupe ici) making a huge noise. But the teachers don't give up and captivate the students' attention with activities that motivated (pas de D) the students. The teachers finally win the respect from their students not because they are authoritarian or strict but because they have find (found) a way to do something witch interest(S) the students meanwhile they learn "real stuffs".

Thanks to teachers, the students have a different image of school. They have been interesting(interesTED) in learning because the teachers had used original methods.

For example, in the Ron Clark Story, Ron Clark made a rap song for his students in order for them to learn (remplace "in order ...learn" par SO THAT THEY LEARN) all of the 42 presidents of the u(U)nited States. And so, with those games, the students have memorized easily and with fun the united states(') history. The students of Ron Clark (DO NOT)not only pass at the end of the year but also they (pas they) have the best grades of all the class(ES) of their level.

In the Dead Poets Society, Mr Keatting gives to his students an other image of the poetry. For him poetry isn't not something that you can learned (learn) in a book, in a(n) academic way (formal est mieux je pense). For Mr Keatting poetry is something that we feel with passion. And to illustrate the way he thinks, he made his students rip out pages of their book(S) which give a rigid method to learn poetry.

In Freedoms writers, Ms Gruwell made realized her students (makes her students realise) that if they want to cope their suburb life, with fights between gangs, they have to succeed in school to have a chance to go to college and give up their actual difficult life.
The students get to liking the writing in reading stories who looks like theirs and in writing theirs (their) own history.




Conclusion

To conclude, we can say that the problematic of these movies is always "how to make the students learned?(learn)" and so the teachers are represented with a positive image because they do whatever they can to make the students leaned (idem). The teachers love their job, there a good educationalist (they are ou they're). In fact, the teachers are being (are seen) seen both as educators and mediators.
Educator(S) because the teachers learn (teach) things to students like grammar or mathematics and mediator(S) because they deal with conflict(S) with students between each other (deal with conflicts between students) or with conflict with the parents.

However, the teachers are a little idealizing. They are be (pas de be) seen like heroes who have to save all the students which are difficult and who none want to teach to them.